The kids are alright is a movie directed by Lisa Cholodenko. She really believed that she was showing that every family has struggles, and while it is clear that she wanted to show these struggles, I felt that she did a better job of bringing lesbians into toxic spaces, and creating a movie full of strange stereotypes and household drama.

The movie tells the story of Nic and Jules, two lesbian mothers who have two children: Joni and Laser (who names their kid Laser?). They conceived their two children with donated sperm, and as Joni is now old enough to contact their donor, Laser convinces her to give him a call, since he is eager to know more.

This decision ultimately causes the family’s morals and priorities to crumble. Nic immediately hates their donor, Paul, but the kids both enjoy hanging out with him, and Paul has decided to act as a father. Even though her wife hates Paul, Jules seems to really enjoy spending time with him, especially considering that, as a canon lesbian, they hook up. Multiple times. And even though she feels guilty, it. just. keeps. happening.

The only good thing about the movie was Josh Hutcherson playing Laser.

That salad in Laser’s bowl is straight lettuce– no dressing and no toppings. The big bowl has tomatoes and radishes but nothing else. Who made this food?

Listen, I don’t like Nic’s character either. I think that she is too absorbed in her work, and she doesn’t focus enough on her wife. She is strict and wants to have control over her family. Does that mean I think she deserved to be cheated on? No. And for it to be an affair with their sperm donor, who she had been worried about the entire movie? Really the worst of the worst.

Because the goal was to show that, even with two moms, the American family unit was as strong as ever, I left class feeling confused. What about this movie proved to conservatives that queer families would be okay. Was it the infidelity? Was it the children acting out? Or was it the emotional manipulation from both parents? Or maybe was it the porn that was left accessible to their youngest child.

It’s 2010. If you want to prove that queer people can be good parents, when the public is convinced they can’t, you have to show a pristine family. It doesn’t matter if everything put into the movie is a common sight to see in the average family, conservatives would find no problem gliding over their own problems when they see a queer couple doing the exact same thing.

I just didn’t understand the motives of creating a movie, all with the goal to show that every family is valid, even those with two lesbian moms and a sperm donor, by showing a family with a slew of problems.

I will agree that the movie did well, all things considered. They received a 74% for viewer ratings and a 93% from critiques on Rotten Tomatoes. The movie was made for straight people, showing queer characters, and because of that, totally missed on their queer audiences.

The worst thing about the movie, in my opinion, was that even though it seemed like it was going to be a family about found family, it ended up making an argument against it, strengthening the link to the parents that raised you.

The children, raised by Jules and Nic went out to find a found family. Even though Paul is genetically related to them, he is just a sperm donor, not a father. Because of that, I think that it is safe to say that he was going to be part of their found family; however, with his presence, the entire family dynamic begins to crumble. The movie presents the idea that those who raise you are more important than anyone you might meet, regardless of how they treat you and the people you love.

I would understand this lesson for a normal movie, but by putting queer characters in it, and being anti-found family, the movie is inherently against what is so important to queer experiences. Found family is so crucial to be put into queer stories, because it is such a relatable experience for queer people. By showing in the movie that they are actively fighting against found family, the movie was not made for queer people, just mildly about them, and that is why the movie didn’t do as well with queer audiences. It was missing a crucial detail of the queer life.

Works Cited

Cholodenko, Lisa, director. The Kids Are Alright. 2010.

“The Kids Are All Right.” Rotten Tomatoes, 25 Jan. 2010, 

www.rottentomatoes.com/m/10012141-kids_are_all_right.